my memory
sihuan came over this afternoon, just to pass time. took a ride in her car for fun, and realised tt she IS extremely reckless. aka turning without braking. sat in the car to talk crap after the roller coaster ride. and somehow i just couldn't shake off this shadow that's been creeping up so often lately. soon i have to leave. i have to go, i want to go, but yet i can't bear to now.
yes and so today, as we were talking, this thought kept replaying in my head. leaving on a jet plane, don't know when i'll be back again. then read the letter. i would have my own separate set of 10 things. the cold h2O after training, the chocs before my game, the taozhe cd, the green penknife. and there's more, surely, that i know i will remember occasionally and sometimes laugh, sometimes sigh, sometimes cry. it's always the things that meant something to ourselves that we remember individually. and then there are those memories that shaped us, but that we try so hard to forget, and never manage to. like scars that will never fade.
yet now, i know that every goodbye i say to anyone and everyone may be the last time i see them for the next 4 years, or forever in fact. keeping in touch is tough especially when everyone's busy with their own thing, and though i always say i try, sometimes i just can't go on.
this might very well be the first goodbye said. sooner or later, more will come. and then it'll be over, i'll fly off, and the real friendship test begins. it's sad to goodbye. and it's so hard. so very hard.
take care.
yes and so today, as we were talking, this thought kept replaying in my head. leaving on a jet plane, don't know when i'll be back again. then read the letter. i would have my own separate set of 10 things. the cold h2O after training, the chocs before my game, the taozhe cd, the green penknife. and there's more, surely, that i know i will remember occasionally and sometimes laugh, sometimes sigh, sometimes cry. it's always the things that meant something to ourselves that we remember individually. and then there are those memories that shaped us, but that we try so hard to forget, and never manage to. like scars that will never fade.
yet now, i know that every goodbye i say to anyone and everyone may be the last time i see them for the next 4 years, or forever in fact. keeping in touch is tough especially when everyone's busy with their own thing, and though i always say i try, sometimes i just can't go on.
this might very well be the first goodbye said. sooner or later, more will come. and then it'll be over, i'll fly off, and the real friendship test begins. it's sad to goodbye. and it's so hard. so very hard.
take care.
posted by pei at 6:08 PM
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